There are many situations we face in our lives which make us question the ingenuity of the universe. Some of them are harsh, some funny and some beautifully ironic. One of them is falling for our respective ex’s close friend!
So, if you’re in a situation where you’re head over heels in love with someone who helped you make things work with your ex in the past and now you want to make things work with this person, there are a few do’s and don’ts you can adhere to. Because, let’s be honest, there are a few rules we need to stick to, to maintain the slightest bit of decorum and decency to get through this complicated situation.
Think About The Past For This One
There are certain factors that will help you decide if you should tread on egg-shelled grounds, if you are considering dating your ex’s friend. Think of how close a friend this person was to your ex. Was she your ex’s best friend or a mere friendly acquaintance? What is their relationship now? Are they closer than what they were when you were dating your ex or have they drifted apart? These things will help you understand how to gauge the situation and act on being friendly with your ex’s friend. Make sure you have all the clear cut answers though. Do some research. (not in a stalkerish way).
Do Not Approach Your Ex’s Friend For The Wrong Reasons
Make a move only if you genuinely feel for your ex’s friend. Do not, we repeat, do not make a move to seek revenge on your ex by dating their friend! That’s childish and not fair to both of them. It’s best to clear out any bad air between you and your ex before you make any decision, whatsoever.
Tell Your Ex!
If you do plan to make a move on your ex’s friend, make sure your ex is kept in the loop. You guys might not be in touch but considering you met your ex’s friend, through your ex, it’s only fair you inform your ex about it. It’s not to seek their permission but to have a little bit of integrity and respect for the person you once shared your life with. Similarly, your ex’s friend should also speak to your ex (her friend) if she wants to date you or have something exclusive with you.
Seek Advice From Other Peeps
It’s always good to get a fresh perspective from a third party and it would be great if the third party knows your ex too. So, if you have a common friend, ask for their advice on how you can or should go about this. It can be dicey and tricky if you ex is completely against the idea of you dating one of her friends, so if you can get a friend to give their opinion on this, it would be great!
Do What You Feel Is Right
While you may contemplate going ahead with your decision to date your ex’s friend, there might be many obstacles along the way. There might be people who will judge you or ask you to not go ahead with your decision. Primarily, there are only three people who are involved in this situation; your ex, who needs to be in the loop, her friend, who you have feelings for and your feelings for her should be mutual and you. So if your morals and ethics allow you to express your feelings for an ex’s friend, you should go ahead with the decision. Remember though, you’re responsible for your own actions and if everything works out in the end, you’re good to go!
This one can be a tricky situation but if you handle it well with tact and honesty, it will go as and how you want it to.
Photo: © Dharma Productions (Main Image)
Source of news : Mensxp